Seriously? I’m supposed to just put myself out there?
Be quiet. No one wants to hear your opinions all day.
You’re just…SO MUCH. Can’t you take it down a notch, or three?
Check your tone. People won’t like you if speak like that.
Are you going out looking like…that?
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Where did YOU hear these messages growing up?
Mom? Dad? A teacher? A respected mentor?
(My ballet teacher was never satisfied with my body, and I knew it. It was painful because I was so good at ballet but knew I’d never ‘go anywhere’.)
Maybe it was society - looking around at your friends & seeing how different you were.
Or magazines? I was obsessed with my mother’s Cosmo magazines - but even in Good Housekeeping, which showed up like clockwork every month, everyone was blonde, beautiful, small, and thin.
Then - shit - SOCIAL MEDIA? Has there ever been a more terrible playground for comparison, self-loathing, and less-than-ness?
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If you’ve been tamped down, told it’s rude to have opinions, and no one cares about them anyway…
Then HOW THE HELL are you supposed to now show up as an entrepreneur and MARKET your damn self?
Create your own stage! they say. Start a YouTube channel & put all your brilliance right there.
Use the miracle of searchability! they say. Crank out blogs & videos & SEO the shit outta them so EV-REE-ONE can see your website!
Pinterest & Google make it EASY to share your message. People want to hear from you!
Um. Yeah. I cognitively get it. I encourage it & even teach you HOW…
But deep inside are memories & beliefs screaming at you to stay safe & quietly hide.
No WONDER creating marketing content, putting yourself out there, and saying what you really want to say has felt SO DAMN HARD!
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Maybe you’ve been marginalized, ignored, put down, hated on…in real life, REEL life, or any corner of the interwebs.
You might feel afraid to say what’s real for you…to go all in, sounding like you in an Instagram story or telling the truth in your industry in an email to your list or community.
Though you know you need to create marketing content - whether you start a Facebook group or show up on TikTok once a day - putting yourself out there feels more difficult than it “should” be…
I want to acknowledge how hard this is. You’re not alone. You’re not less-than. There’s nothing wrong with you because it’s felt SO HARD.
As a CIS white woman who doesn’t usually experience anxiety, I have privileges that many entrepreneurs do not, but I have experienced the fear of being seen,
especially after a childhood of being told to sit down & stop talking and a lifetime struggling with my weight & the way I look.
If it’s hard to put yourself out there…
If you think this should be easier - hell, even learning ways to MAKE IT EASIER…
but remain challenged to let yourself be seen…
have you considered that the messages you’ve received & stored inside you are holding you back?
It’s all very real, even if you think, “I should be over this by now!”
It keeps us from making the leap into who we need to BE…
to HAVE & DO what we want in our businesses!
That’s why I talked with Teddey Hicks, Food & Body Love Coach, intuitive eating counselor, and hypnotherapist about how to deal with the messages we take in throughout our lives that hold us back.
Teddey started our chat by saying,
“Even if it's not necessarily the way you look that's holding you back, you can just have this whole set of beliefs about not being smart enough, educated enough, enough certifications, not being a professional who knows everything...
“No matter what that thing is holding you back from showing up authentically & really being yourself…it doesn't have to be a limitation every time you decide to show up online or want to post some content!”
Teddey & I discuss:
- how to show up when hate the way you look or don’t fit into society’s “accepted norms”
- when ‘authenticity’ is actually bullshit & what to do about it
- what “fixing this” really looks like - and what it doesn’t!
- strategies to help you overcome your long-standing limitations
If you’ve ever thought you’re not acceptable or not enough - and felt pressure to either change it, fix it, or hide altogether, please check out & share this conversation!
Your clients are out there. Your customers need your message.
It’s your job to figure out how to show up in a way that feels good SO you can help them!
You can do it your way, but you do need to BE SEEN. You do need to market yourself with content that resonates with your audience.
Listen, read, or watch for inspiration, motivation, and education - all in one delicious morsel!
Xo, Jen
