What to do when your project feels like it's failing
Jen, I’m so stuck. My husband thinks I’ve given my idea enough time, but it hasn’t made enough money. I’m thinking it’s time to go back to work at a regular job.
I receive a version of this email/text/call about once a week from various clients.
If you’re a Creative Woman, you’ve probably felt exactly this way.
Is there someone in your life who doesn’t believe in your idea? Or, are you not making money and you feel guilty & frustrated & overwhelmed?
If you’re considering putting your dream off until “someday”, read this love letter I wrote to my client.
I think it might help you – because it really helped her…and me when I felt the same way.
Shoot me a note: do you ever feel like giving up on your dream?
Dear C–,
At some point, every entrepreneur wonders if it’s time to throw in the towel. These moments of darkness are part of the journey.
It’s easy to not believe in ourselves.
We’re isolated. Overwhelmed. Confused about the next step to take.
Most female entrepreneurs I know feel like you.
They wish their husbands could cheer them on instead of point out all the problems.
They want their best friends to understand.
If only their families would hoot & holler in support.
But that’s not always the reality.
I struggled with this in my first business. We weren’t making any money, and we refused to make changes necessary to make money.
I was committed to my limiting beliefs about what I deserved and how much money I could make. I overworked on tasks that didn’t create money.
My husband & friends & family were tired of hearing my bullshit.
Frankly, I was tired of hearing my bullshit.
I stopped going to my husband or friends for support or ideas. It was bad for my marriage & relationships.
Do you feel like this?
Two questions got me clear on what I wanted.
- Do you want to go back to a job? What will life be like? How will life be better? If you that’s what you really want, that’s of course absolutely fine – you just need to like your choice.
If you’ve decided the idea of going back to a job gives you the heebie jeebies, then keep reading.
- Do you believe you can make money in this field? Do you have limiting beliefs about the people you want to work with?
Do you tell yourself that the only people who need you don’t have money?
Or…that people won’t pay for what you offer?
Both are limiting beliefs that you need to be aware of.
Look at my niche market: mostly women who haven’t even started their businesses yet. The story I had for a long time was they don’t have any money. And that’s who I attracted. People who were not willing to invest in themselves.
And it sucked.
When I shifted my belief that I deserved to get paid precisely because I served others, that I would work with only women who were willing to invest time, energy, and money into bringing their ideas to life, that’s when I started making money.
There will always be people who tell you you’re doing the wrong thing. Nay-sayers.
But when you stop asking other people’s opinions and just take charge – work with the people you want to work with – you’ll see things shift. No one can believe there is a market for this more than you can.
But I do. I believe there is a market for this. I believe there are people who will pay.
But until YOU believe it, you’ll undercharge, take clients who won’t pay, that no one needs what you offer, and feel guilty for charging for your gifts.
You’ll think you need your husband’s, partner’s, best friend’s, or mom’s blessing & permission to do it.
But YOU KNOW: there are people who need you. And you can help them.
What does she look like? What’s her name? How old is she? See her in your mind: and when you see her, start to think about how you will help her.
Talk to HER in your videos. Talk to HER in your blogs. Talk to HER in your social media posts.
And if you can’t get there – or you’d rather give up the entrepreneurial journey – of course you can do that too! Go back and get a job.
But please do one thing before you decide that.
Get quiet. Sit alone. Close your eyes. And focus on breathing for 3 minutes. Ground yourself – notice the earth supporting your feet and chair supporting your hips. Feel supported.
And now ask your brain to show you what’s happening in August 2019. One year from now. What is life like? Take a few minutes here and see what your brain shows you.
That’s your future self.
Do you like what you see?
Then ask your brain HOW you did it. What thoughts you changed? What actions you took?
Read this letter a few times…and call me if you need me. I’m here…
xoxo, Jen.
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